Each week Ratty will ask Mole, an admitted football neophyte, to tell you who to put your money on based entirely on: team colors, team locations, who would win in a battle between the team names (i.e. could a Dolphin beat a Bear?) AND a bonus intangible. This week it’s the Seattle Seahawks vs. Arizona Cardinals.
Blue & Green (SEA) vs. Red & White (AZ): Hmmmm, this one is tough. I need a little outside help. I need to consult an outside source
I will go for Blue and Green, because Iris Apfel wears that colour combination and looks swingin’ doing it. So that’s one vote for the Seattle Seahawks.
Seahawk vs. Cardinal: Well I’d like to think that the Seahawks took their name from that Errol Flynn movie about the baddest buccaneer ever to sail the seven seas. Naming your team after a movie wins every time*. That’s another vote for the Seattle Seahawks
*except in the case of the Mighty Ducks, that’s just pitiful.
Seattle vs. Phoenix: All I know about Phoenix is Alice doesn’t live here anymore, and then its TV show spinoff Alice. Aside from Kris Kristofferson, the only thing I liked about Alice doesn’t live here anymore was Valerie Curtin as Vera. In this scene, she pretty much sums up how work is for me every day of my life:
However, is this enough for me to choose Phoenix over Seattle? Seattle, birthplace of Kenny G? Rainy, atmospheric Seattle? Seattle, a coffee lovers’ delight? I love you Vera from Mel’s Diner in Phoenix, but no. Winner: Seattle
Former Seattle Running Back Marshawn Lynch really really likes Skittles.
Like a lot.
Apparently when he was a little boy his mom Delisa used to give him the candy telling him they were “power pellets”. She’d say, “Eat ’em up baby. They’re going to make you run fast and play good.”. My question is what are YOUR power pellets? Is there any candy you eat where you tell yourself, “Eat ’em up baby”? Do they make you run fast and play good?:
Oh great question! Now that I’m a grown woman approaching the age of the new thirty, I will say that I don’t really eat candy anymore. So I have to mine my childhood for answers. I will say that my mother never gave me candy, candy was verboten. However, my father did give me an allowance, which I dutifully spent on chocolate bars. I was very loyal to Wunderbar. I even went so far as to insult other chocolate bars because they couldn’t do what Wunderbar did for me (get stuck in my teeth and coat my tongue). I wouldn’t say they made me run fast and play good, but they did take the edge off a school day.
WINNER: Seattle Seahawks